Loneliness to Solitude: A Guide to Befriending Yourself – Jennifer Bronsnick

Waking up in the morning knowing that you have a day all to yourself can lead some people to jump for joy, while others will be sent into a state of panic.  Everyone has a different emotional response to solitude depending on past & current attachment styles, family dynamics, whether we identify as introverts or extroverts, among other things.  The truth is that there is NO right way to respond when it comes to alone time.  The most impactful thing you can do is bring self-awareness and self-compassion to the person you are today, while you explore your needs for closeness…and distance.   

Regardless of how you currently feel about solitude, it might be helpful to know that there are benefits to be gained by spending some time alone each day.  Think of embracing solitude as a stepping stone to becoming your own best friend!

Benefits of Solitude Include: 

You can do whatever you want. You get to do whatever you want when you’re alone. Imagine, you can eat what you want, control the Netflix show you want to binge, take a nap. You can literally do anything you can afford to do without having to worry about making someone else happy.

It’s easier to concentrate. Have you ever noticed how much more you can get done when everyone leaves you alone? It doesn’t matter if it’s at home or at work. Being alone is a great time to tackle those projects you never seem to have time to do.  Likely because you don’t have to worry about being interrupted so you can access the flow state that is a wonderful mix of focus and excitement.

You learn more about yourself in solitude. It’s much more difficult to be self-aware if you never spend any time by yourself. Your thought processes become more apparent when you’re not distracted by others.  Ideally, spend an extended period of time by yourself each year. Spending time in nature is particularly healing, especially if you live with others or in a crowded city. It’s also a great to explore your feelings in your own energy.  Many of us are empathic or sensitive to others energy so being in our own aura can bring great clarity about how you really feel.

Creativity increases during periods of solitude. There’s a reason why artists, musicians, writers, and other creative types go into isolation when it’s time to create. Your mind is much freer to wander and develop new ideas.  Try breathing deeply into your heart and then activating a positive feeling state like peace or joy, then ask yourself, “what would be a creative way for me to experience being alone?”

Your alone time is the perfect opportunity to work on your bigger challenges, make big decisions, and ponder the meaning of life.

A little solitude makes you happier.

You can think deep thoughts. It’s hard to think about your life in a deep and meaningful way when you’re surrounded by others and constantly interupted. Your alone time is the perfect opportunity to work on your bigger challenges, make big decisions, and ponder the meaning of life.
A little solitude makes you happier. Several studies have shown that people that regularly have some time to themselves are happier than those that don’t.  I like to believe that it’s when we are alone it gives us the chance to fall in love with ourselves.Ultimately, humans need other humans, and we would never want to be alone 100% of the time.  We also can’t fully THRIVE or understand who we truly are without at least a little bit of solitude.  

You may even notice by shifting your mindset from feeling lonely to enjoying some solitude that your mood starts improve.  

Jennifer Bronsnick is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker & Anxiety Treatment Specialist.  She supports women and teen girls who struggle with anxiety, self-doubt & perfectionism tap into their innate resilience, get to the root of their fears and implement custom healing strategies so that they can experience peace of mind, more self-confidence and be liberated from the suffering that living with anxiety causes. 

Jennifer uses a variety of treatment modalities including Human Design, Mindfulness-Based Therapy, Hair Tissue Mineral Analysis + Health Coaching, Energy Psychology tools, Heartmath and more! She believes that everyone’s experience of anxiety is unique, and the solution should be customized to the client’s needs and desires. Learn more about Jennifer and get a FREE Panic Attack Survival Guide at www.jenniferbronsnick.com.